Ode to a Horse

Joe came into my family's life in 1989, when I wasn't quite 17. He was brought down by my parents' friends from Oregon in a 1955 Miley 2 horse trailer being towed by an RV, one side filled with Alfalfa. They didn't get Joe out once because they were afraid he wouldn't go back in. My parents' friend had a back injury and could not ride Joe anymore. He did use Joe to hunt off of and apparently he pulled a travois with a deer on it once.
Joe was a great big old style blood bay Morgan. He shined when he was all groomed up. He was only 15.2 hands but due to his style he was our heaviest horse. We always knew when we were hauling Joe unlike our taller TB, Standardbred, or QH. His feet were also huge, to hold his mass.
Joe became my dad's horse for awhile. He enjoyed saddling him up and riding around, even when my dad was getting sick.
Joe taught a lot of people to ride. He was very good at figuring out who needed the extra protection and who could be tested a lot. He was my best 4H horse and always dumped the know-it-alls on the ground. He always knew when he was at a show, even when he was older, and "studded up" (making himself look muscley) and put on a proud head carriage. My stepson started riding him at 7 months and my favorite picture is of the three of us showing leadline at the fair, as "My Eee" when my stepson was only 16 months.
He was a true Morgan with an amazing sense of humor. He played keep away with a chain with one farrier, water splash fights at the lake, and once made the most god awful noise when a young farrier was working on his front leg - the farrier looked up thinking something was wrong when Joe blew saliva and snot all over him. We had all heard and seen the horse version of hocking a lugey.
Joe got old, and while no longer ridable, due to a kick fight injury to his knee, he still loved to be groomed, bathed, and loved on. We agonized for the last year over the big decision. We had to put my mom's horse down before the winter, the two had been almost inseperable for 20 years. Joe was very angry and agonized for a day over losing her. We put Joe in the arena and didn't go near him for a day. We thought then about the decision. Joe had sweet itch which made spring and summer miserable for him. The last year or so he's had such a hard time getting up after rolling.
One night, 3 weeks ago, Joe laid down for the last time. My stepson found him during morning feeding and came up and got my mom. He didn't look as if he was in any distress, just that his big old Heart gave out.
The herd lost one great old horse, with a huge personality and the pasture isn't the same without him.
Oh Joe I miss you so.

A really didn't know why I was feeling so melancoly for Joe last night until I was sitting waiting for the Kindergarten bus to show up with my daughter today. Today was the first day of school and I was reminded of the all the years that Joe would stand and wait at the fence for first my stepson and then my son to get off the bus. He waited everyday and even in the summer would stand at the fence watching, until he had to move to the old horse pasture. That memory was hiding away for the right moment.

Army

I am visiting a family member who is deploying in August in Texas. It is not as hot here as it is at home. That in and of itself is a bit disconcerting. I was the only one in a cowboy hat on the plane from LA also, which surprised me. I wasn't about to check it through although I did bite the bullet for security and checked the boots and wore sandals.
I am exhausted but enjoying this look into a military base.
My dad was regular army, which is what my niece is in also. So it's interesting to get a glimpse of the base and listen to her and other NCO's and soliders talk. I'm actually picking up some of the lingo. By the time I was old enough to listen to my dad's stories, really listen to the uncensored adult version, my dad was starting into the Alzheimer's.
It's also scary to listen to their stories from the war, true stories, not censored fit for the news stories.
It makes me appreciate the true courage these young men and women have. It makes me worry that these men and women won't make it home the next time. It makes me proud of being an American. Seeing America through there eyes makes me realize how much we take for granted and how lucky we are.
The army men and women make friends fast and they play hard. I think it is because of how close many of these men and women have been to mortality. It isn't a matter of if a friend will die but when and every single NCO or specialist I have met on this trip has lost a friend. They work hard on deployments so they play harder at home to make up for what they missed and what they are going to miss.
No matter your views of this war. No matter your views of the administration. Please, please remember to thank a soldier for the service he or she is preforming for this country.

Took my breath away.

While wandering thorough KMart yesterday I saw and showed hubs some teeny-tiny sandals. Really took my breath away and I teared up there in the store. UGH. Heather would be almost 3 months now. I still have overwhelming moments of sadness, the heart aches, the gut hurts, the eyes burn when I think of all the moments that I'm missing. Sash would have been a great big sis.

Death

Our old dog, Jack, died last Mon. He was between 14 and 16. He was a bait dog that showed up at my parents ranch several years ago. My mom tried to get rid of him by throwing rocks at him and chasing him with a broom. He wouldn't leave. He knew a sucker when he found one. One of his ears didn't move. Then he got hit by a car and my mom drug him home a mile not long before her female surgery. There went the use of one back leg and he found a home, he was hers. Then they moved out here and he took over my husband. LOL. He just faded away, like old people do. He didn't eat or drink the last few days. He was happy to get pets. He'd just lie around. He'd quit really eating the last month or so.One thing about living in the country. Our kids are comfortable with death. My hubby and step-son dug the hole. We buried him, said some words, put flowers on him, and then on top of the grave. Sasha was sad and still says how much she misses him. BB says he's sad but he's ok as Jack and he weren't close. Little Mike was sad also, Jack took care of him. When he was tied up in front he would play with Mike and when a new neighbor walked up he shoved little Mike into the front door, wrapped himself around his legs, and growled at the neighbor. He wasn't going to let me past either but I said "it's ok, it's the neighbor, go lay down" and he did. I always felt safe with him around. He loved to be scratched and pet but I knew he was on guard. His collar was always loose and every few months or so he'd slip his collar and go for a run. We'd find him in the barn. I just didn't want him to get hit by a car. Those shiny fenders were just to much to resist catching.Back to the kids. We, over the years, have buried dogs, cats, a goat, several chickens, and we've lost two horses. We've never hid it from the kids. When my dad died in 2001 he was buried at the National Cemetary. On the way down, Little Mike was sitting in the back with my mom and he got all flustered and worried. He said "we forgot something". He said we forgot the shovels. We explained we didn't actually have to worry about that someone else will dig the grave. He was only 5. Death and Life are just every day occurances to farm kids. I think it's better than way actually. Just my thoughts.

Brand New

Well I'm pretty new Blogging but I thought I'd give it a try. I have 4 kids, my step-son 12, a son 6, a daughter 3, and a daughter that we just lost in stillbirth. I think that's why I thought I'd sign up and blog. Writing always makes me feel better. I had a hard time with losing my baby but I have to believe that it's for the best.
I am Jedi mom as my children, hubby, and myself are enthralled with Star Wars. We don't do the 501st mainly because we just don't have the time, the sewing knowledge, or the money to put out for the outfits. I have active and busy kids, but we have scaled all their activities down until after the new year. My oldest is in Jr. High and switching classes this year, so he is taking the time to get used to all of that before he picks an activity to go back to.
Well I think that's all for now. But I have a goal to write a bit everyday.